Hello September :)

11 August was such a big deal to everyone.
For those yang nak pursue their studies in degree mainly.

Students from STPM, Asasi, Matrikulasi & also Diploma would have to compete among each other since dari final exam sampailah interview session.

Alhamdulillah thanks to Allah cause he answered my doa to pursue my LLB in UKM.
Bila semua tanya : Why tak continue kat UiTM, it's the best law school kot.

It is not about to study at one particular place yang gah or on top of the world,
I believe it is all about how you're going to bring yourself and your life better towards a better learning condition.

No, I'm not saying UiTM is a bad environment to study, it is such a pleasure to spend almost a year doing my foundation.
I learnt a lot of things there but I just need to move and travel to another place and I was pretty sure with myself that my heart wished for UKM.

I could literally feel the challenging atmosphere masa interview haritu sebab mostly ramai chinese and indian, ain't that supposed to be a good thing? :)
Even in Islam, kita digalakkan not to stay at one particular place, we have to move around or berhijrah.

I believe that's how life has taught me, to meet a lot of people, to make friends with them.
From Lenggong to KL and next was Shah Alam and this time it's going to be Bangi, so hello Bangi people :)
Let's leave this here and move on to the next issue.

The thing is, for those yang tak dapat UPU/dapat tapi bukan first choice/dapat tapi jauh/dapat & ada financial crisis :

Put your hands together and pray to Allah. Tell him how sad you are but you still redha dengan apa yang dia dah tetapkan. Tell him to make you feel more stronger so that you could face this. Tell him to make you feel at peace so that you could think wiser of taking the next steps. Tell him everything that you ever wished for. After all, kat siapa lagi kita nak mengadu?

Those yang dah appeal, please be mindful of yourself.
Allah won't put you in devastated condition just because He likes it, He knew what He's currently planning. Thus, tawakkal lepas berusaha.

and to those juniors yang tengah study either in foundation, matriks etc,
Please jangan banyak main and strive your very best not only masa waktu exam, but also strive dalam menjaga hubungan dengan Allah, jaga hubungan dengan manusia : Habbluminallah Habluminannas.

Bila rasa nak give up dengan belajar or stress out, ingat balik tempat mengadu kita.
Busy macam mana pun dengan kelas cause I am fully aware dengan jadual foundation yang extremely packed, but please ingat like my mom always said "Solat jangan tinggal"

Dalam kelas, manners jaga, either dengan lecturers, classmates, makcik cleaner, guard etc.
Don't fool yourself telling others to respect you just because you're a law student when you're doing otherwise, that's not the way honey.

Thus, please, I ingat lagi Madam Atifah selalu pesan : "Biarlah saya mengajar orang bodoh tak reti baca yang buta tuli asalkan dia ada manners"

Goodluck everyone and congratulations :)

Self Confessed Dream Junkie

I have no idea on how many times did I cry whenever bangun dari tidur.
It's like there is this one time you decide nak tidur awal sebab taknak stay up late so that you won't be overthinking about stuff or ended up talking to strangers on Omegle - omg that is so Teah.

Tapi bila dah mula tidur awal and have a good sleep pattern, you will start to have a couple of dreams that looks so real like if there's this one person tryna hold your hands or touch you, you still can feel their gestures and soft touches bila bangun.

I told my mom "Yah ada mimpi pasal crime scene. There's this one van yang bawak mayat and all of sudden when they open the door, tiba tiba the body gone missing."
and she replied me with this : Kalau dah pagi petang siang malam tengok foxcrime, mana taknya mimpi macam tu.

Oh k.

Then ada this one dream pasal our previous prime minister and I asked my mom "Kali ni apa pulak maksud dia? Don't tell me about cabinets and parliaments cause clearly tak pernah pergi sana pun."

and this one dream where I ran all over a house because ada this one culprit tryna catches me and kat tangan dia ada gun.
Right before dia tarik picu where he already pointed the gun towards my face, I terus bangun lol.

K enough those dreams are acceptable sebab tak bagi effect pun on my daily routines.
But lately I constantly have a lot of dreams about this one person and I don't seem to like it at all.

The thing is whenever I have the dream of this particular person, the next day when I wake up I will feel my heart aches and bleeding in a way I can't explain.
I would definitely start to look at things and merenung till some points my mom akan tanya "Kenapa ni?"

This time I won't tell her because I promise myself I won't mention about the person anymore.
But you know it is such a pain to keep it all to yourself and sometimes you feel so scared to fall asleep.

I did some readings on dreams and their meanings.
Some of the articles state the same things :

"Maybe you're not happy right now. Thus, your subconscious of mind trying to bring you back all those good memories with the person you loved the most."

Whenever I read this line again and again, I feel the pain in my chest like omg teruk sangat ke aku layan diri aku? Since when I didn't pay much attention to my body?

"Maybe you're denying a lot of stuff lately. Thus, all those unspoken words that your mind have when you are fully awake is actually trying to let it all out in your dreams."

This is so true but it's not I am denying stuff or any kind of feelings or situations.
I just want to be more stronger and mature by not paying attention to any stupid feelings.

"Maybe you have a lot of questions to ask that person. Things might not be settled in a good way back then."

Maybe but lemme repeat : I don't want those kind of questions or uncertainties or memories because I don't care anymore. 

I might be broken for now but thanks God I always ended up having peace on my prayer mat and telling Him all of this bila taknak bagi tau my mom.

My friend once told me "Whenever you find yourself questioning on certain things that happened but you don't really wanna know the answers, pray to Him to let you be stronger in facing the realities. Tell Him the pain you have endured, don't be embarrassing to cry whenever you can."

Random Fiction

pg 158-159

After an hour the wind dies down,
so the kite-flying part of our day is over.

I pull out my phone and check the clock,
My stomach's telling me it's time to eat something.

I quickly reply to a text from Madison,
then I'm back to wondering what comes next with Cade.

"Heads, sushi," I say.
"Tails, Chinese."

"Well, it better be tails because I don't do sushi."

"You don't do sushi? Christ, kill me now!"

I pick up a small stick and pretend to stab it into my chest,
and drop to the sand on my back.

I lie there with my eyes closed.

Warm breath on my neck,
Soft shiver down my spine.

Sweet words whispered in my ear,
"But with you, I might try anything."

- Lisa Schroeder, The Day Before

of Green Fingers & Ulangtahun

Roses are red, 

Violets are blue.

Sunflowers are yellow.

I bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts :D

So the day I went to UKM for my interview, I beli biji benih bunga matahari kat Tesco Kajang.

I have no idea what I was thinking like OMG Teah nak menanam seriously?

Maybe this plant could remark the biggest day of my life like Hey it's my babysteps to enter the next level of legal field so why not if I spend my money on sunflower seeds? :D

Happy two months baby!

I asked my mom "Kenapa tak keluar bunga lagi? Dah dua bulan ni"

and then she came out with this "Kena banyak bersabar. Eh tengok ni dah keluar pucuk dia, ha tak lama lagi ada lah bunga nya. Besar tau bunga dia nanti"

Hey little tiny creature, keluar lah cepat :(

My mom pesan tanam pokok ni memang kena banyak bersabar.

Sometimes you plant something and you don't expect it to grow as fast as you were expecting cause it could actually die due to some circumstances.

Macam tu jugak dengan hidup.

Kita ni plan memacam tapi esok belum tentu lagi kita ni hidup atau tak.

Deep jugak tanam tanam pokok ni like it gives us the meaning of life to have some patience in doing something :)

My mom ada tanam satu pokok ni bila mana asal orang datang rumah they will keep saying :

"Eh cantiknya pokok ni. Ni bukan ke pokok yang selalu orang cina tanam?" or 

"Nanti kalau ada benih, saya nak boleh? Cantiknya" or

"Haritu saya ada tanam tapi tak rasi, this time nak ambik anak pokok terus boleh?"

Pokok burung :)

Actually anak benih pokok ni was given by Ma, the chinese neighbor selang satu rumah.

She told my mom not everyone boleh bela pokok ni since dia perlukan keserasian dengan owner dia, ikut kepercayaan dia lah.

See, bentuk burung? That's why orang panggil pokok burung :)

While my mom tengah gembur gembur tanah nak letak baja tahi ayam kat Encik Bunga Matahari and other pokok, I helped her cari biji benih.

Usually biji benih ni ada kat pokok burung tu sendiri so you just find the one yang dah a little bit rotten and kering pastu tanam balik kat dalam pasu dia.

Like this one tak rotten lagi so biarkan.

Ha this one dah garing so boleh ambik and tanam balik dalam pasu but first you have to break it apart sebab dalam biji ni ada lagi 3 anak benih.

Nak jaga pokok burung is really complicated, my mom la yang cakap.

Kena selalu bagi attention like belek belek and kena letak kat tempat teduh.

But it's really worth kot sebab impressive to have a plant that actually imitate another creature which is a bird :)

This is my mom's another plant, pokok balung ayam. Eh yeke eja watevah.

Awak yang duduk dalam pasu aloe vera kita tengah buat apa tuuu!

of funeral & Allah's plans

Went to a funeral yesterday with my family.
This is my second time attending funeral, for real.

Ayah kepada kawan kakak meninggal and we received the phone call at 3am.
My dad decided nak pergi jugak funeral tu kat Kedah eventhough penat sebab the day before drive pergi balik Tanjung Malim sebab hal kakak.

The family used to attend my brother's wedding on February and he was so happy at that time and telling all other family members "Nak pergi kenduri kahwin kat Lenggong ni"

Bertolak dari rumah after subuh and sampai Ayer Hitam dalam pukul 10 lebih macam tu.
Ramai gila yang ada kat depan rumah arwah plus hari Jumaat kan cuti for rakyat Kedah.

Right on time je kitaorang sampai sebab orang dah ramai dalam rumah tu nak solat jenazah.
Then my dad decide nak ikut pergi kubur while my mom, kakak and I decide nak stay kat rumah tu and approach family kawan kakak.

This is my first time seeing all these with my eyes.
Each and every person yang peluk wife Arwah akan bisik something kat telinga dia and kiss dua-dua belah pipi dia.

Maybe everyone akan cakap "Be strong" or "Allah lebih sayangkan dia".
I have no idea nak cakap apa time peluk wife arwah so I just rub her back.

She sat with us after that.
"Arwah berhenti kerja 23 April hari tu lepaih habaq mai dia tak larat dah"

I saw a lorry outside the house and I assumed her husband must be a driver of a lorry.
She continued "Masa bulan posa haritu dia dok habaq pi ja la tarawih, jangan dok seriau dia. Haih takkan nak biaq pi dia gitu ja".

Deep in my heart I knew she doesn't have to put a lot of effort in telling others how much she loved her husband.
She told my mom lately dia takda selera nak makan plus her husband kept asking her "Dah pukui berapa ni" and "Akma balik bila?" Akma, anak kedua dia and kawan kepada my sister.

While she continued with her stories, I saw my mom's face.
She must be wondering how it feels like to lose your husband at the young age of your marriage.
Arwah died at a very young age, 52 years old.

While me at that time I'm asking myself "Me myself dah ready ke nak hilang my very own dad?"
No ones ask for any kind of losing among your family but we knew cepat atau lambat, benda tu akan jadi.

I still remember telling my friend how overprotective my dad was and he told me this :
"I don't know man, someday you gotta travel by your own and stand on your own feet. I believe every father out there is trying to protect their daughters selagi diaorang masih hidup and thus you should not question when he does that okay sweety?"

Some things are beyond planning.
and life doesn't always turn out as planned.

You don't plan for a broken heart.
You don't plan for an autistic child.
You don't plan for spinsterhood.
You don't plan for a lump in your breast.
You don't plan to be young forever.

You plan to climb the corporate ladder.
You plan to be rich and powerful.
You plan to be acclaimed and successful.
You plan to conquer the universe.
You plan to fall in love - and be loved forever.

You don't plan to be sad.
You don't plan to be hurt.
You don't plan to be broke.
You don't plan to be betrayed.
You don't plan to be alone in this world.

You plan to be happy. You don't plan to be shattered.

Sometimes, if you work hard enough, you can get what you want.
But most of the times, what you want and what you get are two different things.

We, mortals, plan.
But so does Allah in the heavens.

Sometimes it is difficult to understand Allah's plans especially when His plans are not in consonance with ours.

Often, when He sends us crisis, we turn to Him in anger. 
True, we cannot choose what Allah wishes us to carry, but we can carry it with courage knowing that He will never abandon us nor send something we cannot cope with. 

Sometimes, Allah breaks our spirit to save our soul.
He breaks our heart to make us whole. 

Sometimes, he allows pain so we can be stronger.
He sends us failure so we can be humble.

Sometimes, he allows illness so we can take a better care of ourselves.
He takes everything away from us so we can learn the value of everything He gave us.

Make plans people but understand that we live by Allah's grace.

Almond London Rangup

A couple of days before balik Felda for hari Raya haritu, I ada buat almond london.
Mula-mula macam takut sikit sebab bakery right, bukannya memasak.
Kalau memasak kat dapur tu kurang masin sikit boleh je letak geram kalau kurang manis tambah gula.

Ni kalau kuih or biskut or dough tak jadi, get ready kena bebel dengan my mom.
Ayat dia tak lain tak bukan : Mak cakap dah. Buat kuih ni susah.
Kakak kena bebel haritu sebab dough untuk sarang semut dia jadi berketul and I have no idea how to help sebab takda skill bakery.

Tapi gigihkan jugak hati ni buat almond london.
My mom cakap jangan takut kalau nak start new recipe, pasang niat nak kasi orang makan and paling penting masak and time buat tu kena ada kasih sayang aw haha.
My sister helped me with the ayak ayak tepung and gula, the rest I buat sendiri sampai 2 pagi.
While everyone else semua dah tidur.

My biggest gratitude goes to this one blogger lah sebab sudi share recipe. (http://ruhayurazali.blogspot.com)
Dia pun dapat recipe tu dari blogger lain but whatever still nak cakap thank you so much :)

So here we go with the recipe as requested by someone.

Bahan (150 biji)
250g mentega
125g gula halus
1 biji telur
1 sudu teh esen vanila
50g serbuk badam (optional)
200g kacang badam,digoreng tanpa minyak
50g badam cincang untuk hiasan
+/- 700g cokelat compound

Bahan Ayak
200g tepung jagung
300g tepung gandum
1 sudu besar tepung beras
1 sudu teh baking powder

Cara

1. Pukul mentega dan gula sehingga kembang. Masukkan esen vanila dan pukul lagi.
2. Masukkan serbuk badam & kacau.
3. Masukkan tepung yang telah diayak tadi & gaul rata.
4. Bentukkan doh bulat-bulat kecil/lonjong dan masukkan kacang di dalamnya.
5. Letakkan di atas dulang pembakar yang telah dilenserkan sedikit mentega.
6. Bakar pada suhu 200'C selama 18 minit.
7. Cairkan coklat dengan kaedah doubel-boiler. Celupkan biskut tadi dan letak dalam kertas cawan. Taburkan badam cincang di atasnya. Biarkan ia kering. Siap disimpan.

p/s :

• Since I tak makan kacang badam/almond, I prefer blend kacang badam tu and campur sekali dengan tepung so that nanti dah masak tak terasa sangat rasa almond tu.
• Tepung beras tu rahsia nak kasi biskut almond london jadi rangup so don't hesitate to include it in your cooking :)
• If rasa susah time nak celupkan dough dalam coklat masak, my mom ada cara. She asked me to boil the water in rice cooker and letak coklat masak tu dalam periuk lain and letak periuk tu dalam rice cooker. More handy and comfortable cause you have the choice nak letak kat mana rice cooker tu. Kalau masak atas dapur, nanti mula lah lenguh sebab kena berdiri. Nak celup bukannya sejam dua :)
• Nak tau dough tu masak ke tak, masa bawak keluar dari oven, check punggung dough tu. If dah warna kuning, masak lah tu. If hitam or coklat, hangit namanya haha so better kurangkan masa untuk oven :)

Kakak will be like "Ya Allah bosannya kau buat dough, Tak bosan ke?"

I have this one habit of consistency where I'll be doing one job and even benda tu macam nampak bosan sebab golek golek buat dough macam play-doh tu, tapi time camni lah boleh fikir banyak benda like "Ish ni kalau my future kids nak makan almond london senang la after this" lol

Minions of dough in the oven for almost 18 minutes.

Minions of dough yang dah dimasak and a closer look of the shape.

Comelnya awak ni!!! Gebu pulak tu!!

Lepas dah kena celup tu biar dia keras dulu, jangan terus letak dalam bekas kedap udara.

 There you go :)

My paksu ada request nak satu balang dalam 50 biji right after I posted this picture on our family's group on whatsapp but then I cakap tak boleh sebab dah tak sempat but I'm so happy you know like everyone yang makan semua will be like "OMG DAPNYE" Yay!

Goodluck everyone :)

@>

awak awak awak & awak yang kat sana tu.
lemme tell you one thing : it's okay not to be okay.

Don't be scared to find yourself lost not knowing your real state of mind.
It's okay to be tangled up with thoughts and twisted fear.

Soon enough you will be okay, just like how you used to tell other people around you.

Don't blame yourself with all the choices you made.
It is just the matter of time to turn everything okay, you just have to bear it in your mind.

In the end everything will be okay, if it's not okay then it's not the end.

I've been a multiple of times in those conditions and I really know how does it makes you feel.
Worthless, dysfunctional and scared.

Time will pass by and soon you will be you again :)

More Like Her //

Seriously I have no idea orang lain punya life goals macam mana.

Rumah besar ke, kahwin dengan orang kaya ke apa ke.

Sometimes you don't easily set one particular goal without knowing the real strategy or path.

Setengah orang set diaorang punya goals based on experiences, references.

But for me, I have this one particular person that I always look up to.

Both of her parents kenal my family, like dia punya parents are my parents' good friends.

Her mom pulak English teacher kat sekolah menengah back when I was in form 3.

I panggil mak dia Teacher Habibah / Teacher Bibah.

Dia lembut sangat bila mengajar, very keibuan and tak pernah marah anak murid dia.

and dia selalu story pasal life dia like how she met her husband and pasal anak-anak dia including this one daughter yang dulu study kat STF.

After balik sekolah I selalu story balik kat my parents and kakak I ada cakap "Oh tak ingat ke, She used to be your good senior time sekolah agama dulu."

Seriously I don't remember her at all.

When I told Teacher Bibah I'm going to pursue law, she wasn't like everyone else yang cakap "Takda course lain ke" or "Susah tu banyak menghafal".

She said this to me : Go for it Fatihah. I know you can do it. I always believe in you. Have faith.

and dia bukak cerita pasal anak dia yang ni yang pursue law and right now tengah degree kat UM.

I had a zero knowledge pasal course ni and Alhamdulillah time orang pertikaikan my decision, Allah datangkan this one person to help me to get through the day.

Right before masuk foundation for the second semester kat UiTM, her mom sent me buku-buku anak dia since dah tak pakai.

I was like "Thank you so much." and speechless nak cakap apa other than berterima kasih bebanyak.

I have this one feeling when a senior rela kasi pinjam buku like barakah or something and maybe dah terbiasa sebab kat SESERI dulu pun those yang graduated mesti kasi pinjam buku kat juniors.

Till this day, whenever my parents jumpa parents dia or when I meet her parents, they always trying to catch up with my life just to make sure I'm in the right track.

and gambar kat atas tu macam best gila tau right before graduate dapat buat attachment and her mom cakap right now dia bahagian criminals kat Ibu Pejabat Polis Daerah Ipoh, I'm crying T_T

Thumbprints, post mortem, autopsy and everything yang related dengan crime scene, a lawyer must know it really well and I have no chill for this, cepatlah sambung study diri ini uhukz.

Goodluck Kak Mimi, I know you can make through all of this, dear future lawyer :)

Beautiful Syawal :)

Tahun ni punya raya my mom cakap nak balik beraya kat Felda since abang takda kat rumah.

If tak nanti terasa tau abang takda kat rumah time raya raya :(

Raya hari Jumaat so we decided to go back Felda as soon as we could sebab nak prepare awal plus opah cakap dia nak balik rumah dia sebab nak masak untuk anak-anak dia.

So we decided balik hari Rabu malam tu after berbuka.

Cuba teka siapa ikut kitaorang balik kampung? 

Apa? Jalak? Rembo?

Takkk. Adik ikut okay!

Dia baik je duduk dalam kereta.

Before this selalu je bawak dia naik kereta gi Kuala Kangsar untuk vaccine and stuff.

Dia banyak bunyi sangat and selalu jalan kedepan belakang kedepan belakang.

Last-last duduk between me and kakak with her butt on my palm zzzz.

One day before Raya

Tolong-tolong mak and makngah buat rendang and kuah laksa.

Tak lama lepas tu makyang pun sampai dengan family dia.

Maka bisinglah rumah dengan budak-budak yang tak berapa nak cerdik lagi running around the house main aci nyorok apa benda tah sampailah Aki tempik "Tak habis habis main tak puasa ke?!"

Pagi Raya

Bangun dalam 5.15am sebab terdengar Makngah jerit cakap "BANGUN WOI SAHUR".

I was like eh bukan dah habis ke puasa lol mamai.

Terus bangun and tolong mak and makngah prepare for nasi tomato.

Lauk dia macam baisa ayam masak merah and jelatah.

Dalam pukul 8 pagi macam tu abang cakap nak skype dengan the whole family.

For the first 15minutes mak okay lagi and tak lama lepas tu dah mula berambu air mata hahaha.

Abang tak habis habis cakap "takpa next year Insyallah raya sekali. Ijai tak raya lagi harini. Esok baru raya."

Semua orang excited nak tengok muka dia kat skype tambah tambah Makngah and Makyang siap tanya kat wife abang "Takda isi lagi ke?" Lol tak menyempat.

Lepas tu semua get ready nak sembahyang raya and stuff.

Tangkap-tangkap gambar and guess what this year semua orang decide nak cut the cost for raya so kitaorang pun decide pakai baju kenduri abang haritu sebab nak seragam :)

Family belah my mom tak ramai sangat tapi sihat sihat belaka :P

Semua pergi kubur after sembahyang raya visit kubur arwah Nenek, adik my mom and bestfriend Nenek.

Aki datang lambat sikit and masa kitaorang dah nak balik nampak dia tengah menangis tepi kubur Nenek, sumpah sayu je.

I was thinking besarnya cinta Aki kat Nenek even Aki dah kahwin lain and I really want stuff like that.

Lepas tu balik rumah minum minum and pergi beraya.

We decided pergi beraya rumah paling dekat sekali which is rumah Cik Nah followed by rumah Cik Cah.

Both rumah ni bestfriend arwah Nenek and suka nya bila diaorang peluk my mom and adik beradik dia sebab mostly muka my mom yang betul betul macam arwah Nenek.

After Zohor terus gerak pergi rumah Opah kat Sungai Taka, Kedah.

Sampai sampai je I terus cari baby yang datang a night before.

Barely to remember his name, Qalif something

A night before Opah datang rumah dengan anak perempuan dia yang ada baby.

I was about to perform my Isyak's prayer when Iman cakap "Kakayah ada baby kat luar."

I terus keluar and my mom terus kasi babi dia kat I and I was like omg nak ke dia hahaha.

Then dia duduk sneyap je atas riba and all my little cousins ; Iman, Awish, Afif and Mamat surround my and the little tiny baby.

Diaorang adore sangat kat dia, me too me too T_T

The best part bila dia dah kerut kerut kening and I was like "Iman pergi ambik susu kat mama dia!"

Iman lari laju gila gi ambik botol and baby tu habiskan susu tu dalam 5 minit macam tu, laju gila.

I bet he was really hungry tho.

Okay stop that was the story night before raya, now back to our first day for raya :)

Lepas dah lunch rumah Opah, Opah panggil "Deqyah jom tengok rumah adik Opah dia ada ke tak."

Kitaorang merempit naik motor and bila dah sampai Opah cakap "Okay diaorang ada. Deqyah pi balik bawak motor ni habaq kat mak mai datang sini."

I was like Aku? Merempit? Sorang? Kat kampung orang? Ingat ke jalan?

Alhamdulillah bila dah sampai rumah Opah semua tanya "Woi kamu tinggal Opah tengah jalan ke?" T_T

Terus gerak eprgi rumaha dik Opah and semua terpegun.

Bukan lawanya rumah ke apa tapi surrounding dia.

Rumah dia kecik je macam homestay gitu tapi depan tu ada kebun pisang something then belakang tu ada pondok besar and belakang pondok ada bendang.

Berangin je bila kitaorang duduk situ, and mula lah berangan nak rumah tepi sawah ala ala cerita Nur Kasih gitu ewah!

Sejam lepas tu terus pergi rumah kawan ayah area situ nama dia Cik Peah.

Then my mom suruh tuang air and lantai rumah dia tak rata and air tumpah and Uda I terus jerit "Eh Kak Peah Peah Peah".

Semua gelak cause it sounds so sarcastic sebab sebut banyak kali and pangkal dia 'Kak' pulak tu lol.

There you go our first day raya pergi 5 buah rumah :)

Our second day of Raya :)

Second day pun not that bad tapi Makyang dah balik Padang Sanai, Kedah kampung belah husband dia so sunyi lah sikit hmm.

Semua gambar dah takda my cousins yang lain just me, kakak, Iman and her mom.

The whole family including Aki, Opah, Yuyu, Uda, my parents semua pergi rumah pengasuh Iman.

Acah je "Alhamdulillah dapat beraya dengan anak tahun ni. Hak penjagaan anak jatuh ke atas saya sorry Mr Husband lol"

"Kakayah tolong lah Iman betulkan tudung ni dah keluar anak rambut."

"Boleh tak kakayah nak share aiskirm dengan Iman?"

"Boleh boleh.

Then pergi rumah Pak Din Pangkor, husband arwah bestfriend Nenek.

Kemain anak dia tanya nak makan lemang dengan durian and santan ke tidak.

Lejen tak lejen rumah dia weh hidnag durian and brownies.

Then pergi rumah Cik Lina, bestfriend arwah Nenek juga.

Time kitaorang sampai Cik Lina tengah baru nak tepuk tepuk bantal nak take a nap tengah-tengah rumah tu pastu Uda jerit dari luar "Cik Lina oiii buat apa tuuu"

Tak senang orang tua tu nak tidur hahaha.

Then balik rumah and abang hantar gambar first day raya dengan wife dia.

Diaorang masak pagi pagi right after balik dari hospital.

.

See diaorang pun decide nak jimat kos untuk tidak membeli baju raya pada tahun ini so diaorang pun renew baju bersanding time kenduri kat Terengganu omg my family ni cost effective betul, ko hado?

Malam tu kitaorang penat sangat so Opah and Mak masak simple simple je tapi sedap.

Nasi putih, sambal tempoyak and ayam goreng berempah.

The best part bila dah habsi makan and tengok tv and nak tidur, I went to the kitchen and angkat tudung saji and then Yuyu tanya "Ha ko cari ayam goreng eh? Paksu dah makan. Bye".

Patah seribu dengar ayat tu and yes I was looking for the chicken and tak tahu pulak ada orang lain yang tunggu ayam tu juga lol so end up habiskan cucur jagung.

Not to forget our Adik Manis yang sangat behave :)

Time sampai mula mula dia mabuk and taknak berak, makan, minum, tidur.

Awal pagi tu Opah cakap "Masa Opah bangun terkejut Opah tengok dia berdiri tegak dalam sangkar".

Tak lama lepas tu Aki cari air kelapa and dia dah okay.

The best part bila Awish pujuk Adik cani ayat dia "Adik makanla adik. Sedap tuuu adik. Adik makanlaa adik."

Comelnya awak ni Awish T_T

Our third Raya :)

Hari ketiga raya pun not bad after breakfast terus gerak pergi rumah Makngah kat Kubu Gajah and masak masak soto and then makan.

Abah bawak Opah and Aki pergi pekan Selama beli rempah ayam goreng yang Opah guna time masak ayam goreng.

Yuyu cerita "Pak Jamil ambik semua rempah atas rak tu Kak Emah oiii".

Memang sedap pun rempah tu dia cam tepung then siap ada instruction suruh letak sebiji telur before goreng ayam tu.

Plus dia tak berminyak sangat and sedap sangat rasa cam uncle bob that's why boleh berebut dengan Paksu a night before lol.

Thanks Allah for this beautiful family.

I have no idea kalau family orang lain mewah macam mana but I think the true happiness of a family lagi lagi family yang besar macam ni bila everyone clearly knows their responsibilities and always be there bila one of us ada problem.

All the laughs, tears and forgiveness that we shared will surely be remembered through out this generation, Insyallah.

The Longest Ride

*wipe my tears*
*kesat hingus sikit*

The Longest Ride is such a beautiful story.
I don't have time to make a review for this movie cause I need to go to bed quickly.

But I'm fully aware what I'm about to write : the messages of the author to all people out there.

We knew life is not easy, and so is love.
Being in love is a part of our lives and having the circumstances behind it are just another story.

When Sophia fell in love with Luke, she knew her life was going to change.
They came from two different worlds : Sophia with her art enthusiasm and Luke who passionately risking his life in bull-riding.

"I tried to fit in your world of bull-riding but why can't u do the same thing to fit in my world?"
Luke was trying to make art as a joke in front of Sophia's boss and that wasn't supposed to happen.

When Sophia knew she couldn't do this anymore for their relationships, she walked away.
She walked away to figure things out.

Their love story was actually quite similar to an elderly couple named Ira and Ruth.
Sophia tried to look in every angles she could when Ira told her about his love story.

"Love requires sacrifice. The moment you know it's going to be worth, you have to work for it. For me and Ruth, we celebrated every moments that we have and not regretting something we didn't have the chance."

After WW2, Ira had an injury which left him with reproduction problems.
Ruth and him didn't have any children due to Ira's condition while it was Ruth's biggest dream to have a big family but they managed to cope with understanding.

Sophia lost his only opportunity to work with a firm that belonged to her world of art because of Luke.
She had a phone call coming from the hospital telling her Luke was injured on the day she was supposed to go to New York for a huge exhibition.

"How can I be with someone that I don't even know if I could actually see him again everytime he walks out the door? I chose you over my future carrier, why can't you do the same damn thing for the sake of our relationship?"

During Luke's final show, he scored the highest mark but he realized it didn't mean anything to him.
"The girl could be the rest of your life".
He remembered those words uttered by her mother.

From that moment, he knew when Sophia had done everything and left behind her only opportunity just to be with him, he realized he also should be able to make a change by sacrificing his passion in bull-riding and started something knew with Sophia.

"The only thing I do know for sure is that we both want to, we'll find a way to make it work". (The Longest Ride, 2015)

The truth is that the more intimately you know someone, the more clearly you'll see their flaws. That's just the way it is. This is why marriages fail, why children are abandoned, why friendship don't last. You might think you love someone until you see the way they act when they're out of money or under pressure or hungry, for goodness' sake.

Love is something different. It is choosing to serve someone and be with someone in spite of their filthy heart. Love is patient and kind. Love is deliberate. It is hard to be achieved as people yearn for it, live for it and die for it. It is all about pain and sacrifice and seeing the darkness in another person and defying the impulse to jump the ship.